Humor,  National Geographic Kids

Did you wipe your butt today?

Did you wipe your butt today?

It’s a serious question.

And this is not TMI. This is kid speak. Asking a child if they wiped their butt will get them to laugh. That’s good because I need their attention. Yours too.

So did you wipe your butt today?

You don’t need to answer me. I know. Yes, Julie. Yes, I wiped my butt. Everyone wipes their butt because everyone poops. And you know what? Your mother and father are proud of you for wiping your butt. We all are. There are a handful of phrases parents say and “bend over and touch your toes” is one we can’t wait to stop.

I’m rambling.

What I came here to say is we’re going to need that toilet paper roll when you’re done.

We’re going to break a Guinness World Record, kids!

The Guinness World Record – it’s the history book every kid wants in. Did you know the Guinness World Record is named after the Guinness Brewery? It’s true. The former managing director at Guinness Brewery came up with the idea. Since 1955, the book can tell you who’s who of fastest, slowest, tallest, longest, strongest, and shortest. It’s the book of world champions. It’s the book that settles arguments.

National Geographic Kids are experts at getting kids involved with the Guinness World Records. Nine world records have been crushed by readers of National Geographic Kids magazine. Look them up. You’ll find the largest collection of plush toys (2,304 stuffed animals in 2006); longest chain of shoes (10,512 shoes in 2008); and largest online photo album (104,0222 pictures in 2013) under National Geographic Kids name.

It’s 2017. Today’s kids are wiping butts and upcycling toilet paper rolls. We’re making a rocket!

National Geographic Kids will be creating the world’s largest toilet paper roll sculpture – a rocket – for 2017. They need at least 5,000 toilet paper rolls to break the record. You have until May 5th, 2017 to get those rolls to the National Geographic Kids headquarters in Washington, DC.

It’s easy. Wipe your butt. Remove all the toilet paper off the roll. Pull up your pants. Open the bathroom door. Your kid will be waiting. They’re always waiting. Hand the toilet paper roll to your kid to decorate, if they wish. If they do decorate it, you will have to sign off to include your child’s “art.” And then send the toilet paper rolls to:

Nat Geo Kids / Set a Guinness World Record

1145 17th St. NW

Washington, DC 20036 

Easy. Less trash. Clean butts. And your kid can say to their future grandkids, “I’m in that book. I wiped my butt and helped make that rocket.”

If you would like more information, visit National Geographic Kids.



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