• Parenting,  Womanhood

    Relax.

    It’s called chivalry. A gentleman should always hold the door open for a lady. A gentleman should offer his jacket if a lady gets cold. Is chivalry dead? Not unless the woman kills it. I can open the door myself, thank you.  The person that gets to the door first should hold the door open for the following person. Regardless of gender, anyone that wants to give up their coat for a someone that is cold is simply a nice person. Or maybe they’re just hot. It’s a new era. The 2017 etiquette for men has new rules. One rule, really. Flowers are always nice. No, forget the flowers. The one rule: never say the word relax.  I take that back – you can say…

  • NaBloPoMo,  Womanhood

    My date with Amy Schumer.

    ** Warning: This post is rated R. I’m not a G-rated writer by any means but Scott’s grandma reads this and I felt I should post a warning. It’s Amy Schumer, come on. ** I am not a lesbian. Amy Schumer is not a lesbian either. But that’s not going to stop me from calling Amy Schumer my date because my go-to male date was crushing on a male deer from a treestand. Amy did everything right. She told me to put away my cell phone. She never picked up hers. She talked. I listened. She had the wit and delivery to send my ab muscles into spasms. I left…

  • Humor

    Billie Holiday is a woman.

    My last first date was 15 years ago. Good. First dates are awkward. You’re being judged. You’re judging. Everything you do and say is taken into consideration – what you wear, how you speak, maybe even how you smell. Am I pretty enough? Did my comment about whiskey make me sound like an alcoholic? Say something witty. Talk. Say something. Anything. I should tell him how I almost died in a  flood last night. Wait, don’t be dramatic. Ok, he’s funny. He pointed out we’re both shy. That’s cute.  15 years later, I still wonder if I’m pretty enough. I still dress up for dates. I curl my hair and I wear heels.…