• Humor,  marriage

    The next door neighbors.

    I don’t like writing stories that involve alcohol. Drunk stories, if you will. Stories about being under the influence. Sure, they’re funny and they show a part of our personalities that most people will never see. But the land of the Internet is not just you, Scott, and me. It’s employers, it’s potential clients, it’s our parents, possibly our future adult children. It’s our doctors making a mental note to check the “drinks alcohol” box on our charts. It’s people we’ve never met watching Scott and me roll by their house in a red golf cart at 10 a.m. on a Saturday morning. This wasn’t a normal Saturday morning joy…

  • Womanhood

    The weddings turned me into an alcoholic.

    I’m kidding about the title. My liver is in remission. There are no more weddings on the calendar. My muscles are still twitching from the soul of Michael Jackson racing through my body during The Way You Make Me Feel on the dance floor. We had a rush of friends profess their love in front of us this year. Not only this year but within the span of two months. One wedding sent me walking home with a tramp stamp. Another wedding pushed me off to the airport with a hangover. And the last wedding left me with nothing else to write about but I can’t move out of bed and weddings are turning me into an alcoholic. I have been…

  • Travel

    Viva Las Vegas.

    We’re going to Vegas soon. Hell no, we’re not bringing our kids. This is a mommy/daddy vacation. Wait, what am I saying – mommy and daddy? Julie and Scott. Bug and Pook. Ms. Can-I-get-another-whiskey and Mr. Hey-watch-this-dance-move. The birthday boy and his cuter, smarter, younger wife. Call us what you want. I just don’t want to hear mommy and daddy. I don’t even want to hear it from random kids … people! Vegas is not a place for children. Especially on the strip. They can’t possibly have fun walking the strip while their dad gets hooker cards snapped into his hand. We are going with our good ‘ole college friends.…