• NaBloPoMo

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    I fell asleep writing a blog post yesterday. Yesterday was my birthday. 36 years old. It was a tame one, as I would expect any 36th birthday to be. I didn’t even get a cake or ice cream. But I did get to introvert. My houseguests left. The wedding party left. The Russians left. The leftovers went down my drain. The beer, wine, and liquor is put away. My house is quiet and it’s the four of us again. Thanksgiving, a rehearsal dinner, and a wedding – done. I’m exhausted. This page is intentionally left blank. ______________ Wait, don’t go! Find me on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. And don’t forget to buy my…

  • NaBloPoMo

    And that’s how I met the mother of the bride.

    Today is the day when two become one. Today, there will be a marriage between a man and a woman. It’s a blending of two families. The groom’s family hails from middle America. The bride’s family is Russian. The groom’s family wakes up to fireball shots on Thanksgiving/wedding weekend. The bride’s family are non-drinkers. The groom is Scott’s cousin. I will be sitting on the groom’s side today. The mother of the bride will be sitting on the bride’s side. She will be sitting as far as she can from me. Cousin Julie. The rehearsal dinner was going well until the mother of the bride walked up to me with a…

  • NaBloPoMo

    The 12 Days of Thanksgiving.

    On the first day of Thanksgiving my true love gave to me a very dry Russian wedding. On the second day of Thanksgiving my true love gave to me two rehearsal dinner invites, and a very dry Russian wedding. On the third day of Thanksgiving my true love gave to me three peeping boys, two rehearsal dinner invites, and a very dry Russian wedding. On the fourth day of Thanksgiving my true love gave to me four fireball shots, three peeping boys, two rehearsal dinner invites, and a very dry Russian wedding. On the fifth day of Thanksgiving my true love gave to me FIVE GOLDEN FLASKS! Four fireball shots,…

  • Parenting

    The blessing.

    September 30, 2011. It was the eve of my sister’s wedding. Two families gathered inside a historic barn for the rehearsal dinner. Jenna and Steven’s people were in one place, for maybe one of the few times in their life. The spotlight would be on the bride and groom for the next 24 hours. The spotlight only fell once and it landed on a flower girl – a 2-year-old, named Kate. My kid. She proved to over 100 people that everything is funnier when you’re not supposed to laugh. I sat my dinner plate down next to my sister, Jessica. We were the Matrons of Honor. We had prime seats at the front of the room. Our husbands sat…

  • Humor

    Flower petal ornaments.

    Get out of here, Pinterest. Great Grandmas are where it’s at. Scott and I got married in July of 2004. That Christmas, his grandma gave me Christmas ornaments filled with dried flowers from our wedding. They are still one of my favorite ornaments to get out and admire. A few days before Jenna’s wedding, I went to Hobby Lobby. Three hours later, I ended up purchasing what I came in to purchase: clear, empty ornaments. Then came the tricky part – stealing all the drunk bridesmaid’s flowers bouquets while they were dancing. I brought the flower petals home to let them dry out. They dried for about 5-6 days.The flower petals must…

  • Humor

    Simply the wedding of the year.

    I have a new brother-in-law!! And the final Crowder sister is off the market!! The wedding landed on a sunny day, high mid 70s. The ceremony was just as beautiful as the weather, although, tear-filled. Jenna whispered to our dad that she was nervous before walking down the aisle. Our dad’s advice: Just don’t look at your sisters. Jessica and I were on the verge of  a crying mess. When it was my turn to walk down with the Best Man, I had a clear view of Steven’s face. He about lost it when he saw his brother – which made Mike and I cry together down aisle. Jenna came…

  • Humor

    The making of wedding brew.

    My sister and future brother-in-law asked Scott and I to make their groomsmen a batch of Burton Brew as a part of their groomsmen present. I couldn’t have thought of a better idea! Although, I’m kinda jealous we don’t get to drink any of it. We got to work this summer to give fermentation time. The making of wedding brew by Burton Brewery: Now on to the 50 million other Matron duties….

  • Humor

    Wedding crashing.

    I went to a wedding last Friday. I did not know the bride or groom. I did not know the families of the bride or groom. I did not receive a formal invite. I did not have a gift. I drank their champagne while toasting the couple. Know idea who I was toasting to. I ate their food. I ate their cake. I brought their cake home and ate it the next day. I brought my uninvited daughter too. Sound like wedding crashing, right? Yep, pretty much. In reality, I was really babysitting the ring bearer while his mom was doing bridesmaid duties. My good friend, Lorle, called me the…

  • Travel

    Road Trip!

    Scott and I went to La Crosse, Wisconsin this weekend for his cousin’s wedding. We had planned this for months. We would leave the girls with my mom and drive up for the weekend. When I say drive up, I mean Scott drives with maybe me helping him a hour or two. Things took a different turn leading up to the weekend. Scott went to ER Thursday. Had an operation done Friday afternoon. Got the clear to travel Friday from his doctor on the big condition that he under no circumstances could drive. He was on heavy duty pain meds and really needed to lay down. Out of respect for…

  • Humor

    Was once the bride, now forever a bridesmaid…

    I am in full wedding planning mode. The disadvantage to being one of the first to get married is all the stuff you missed out on. Here are the things that have become popular in weddings nowadays: (that mostly didn’t exist in 2004…) 1. Bachelorette parties in other cities. Ok, I’m sure this has gone on since before 2004. But my sisters get to travel. I got WESTPORT. I’m bitter. 2. Photobooths. Like the kind at the mall. You know, push the button then it takes 4 pictures in a row. The actual booth is at your reception for guests to have fun with. 3. Very fancy websites. 4. Custom or homemade…